12/28/2008

Grandparents VS Grandparents

It is the parents that have a major role in modeling the young children’s minds. The children look up to their parents, so the parents’ behavior should be presentable at least in front of their children.When it comes to emotions, parents are influential in this area too. In this article ...

OnClick="window.open('article_show_image.php?img=user_files%2F2996%2FImage%2Fgrandparents+with+child.jpg','','left=10,top=10,width=657,height=445,menubar=no,directories=no,toolbar=no,scrollbars=yes,resizable=yes,status=no')" alt="" />It is the parents that have a major role in modeling the young children%26rsquo;s minds. The children look up to their parents, so the parents%26rsquo; behavior should be presentable at least in front of their children.

When it comes to emotions, parents are influential in this area too. In this article we speak of the fine line between the grandparents on the mother%26rsquo;s and grandparents on the father%26rsquo;s side.

A grandchild is certainly equally adored by both grandparents on the mother%26rsquo;s and on the father%26rsquo;s side. But what about the grandchild? Will s/he requite with the same amount of love or will some other factors get in the way?

Grandparents on both sides with certainly fight for the grandchild%26rsquo;s affection and this little person will often become a subject of jealousy and rivalry between the two. This is where parents come into the picture %26ndash; to create and preserve harmony in the family and teach the child to equally love the grandparents.







Today grandparents play bigger roles in the grandchildren%26rsquo;s lives, in comparison to about three decades ago, simply because there are more grandparents now. A child used to be quite lucky if he or she had at least one grandparent some time ago. Today, most of the kids enjoy attention of all four. Also called %26ldquo;the second parents%26rdquo;, the young grandparents are vital, full of energy, they drive and travel and are just waiting to fulfill their grandchildren%26rsquo;s each wish and challenge. It used to be the grandmother%26rsquo;s role. However, the times have changed and the grandfathers have included themselves into the grandchildren%26rsquo;s lives. Today, they are as equally capable of babysitting and even doing the house choirs.

Grandparents are vitally important for the kids%26rsquo; development and should not be excluded from their lives. Even if there are disagreements between the parents and grandparents, the children should not feel and know about them because this kind of behaviour will certainly lead to emotional detachment on the children%26rsquo;s side.

Grandparents on mother%26rsquo;s side seem to be more involved in the kids%26rsquo; lives; at least this is what the statistics say. Twenty-five to thirty percent of them meet the grandchildren every day in comparison to fifteen percent of the fathers%26rsquo; parents. It is said that psychological factors are to blame and that these factors have been passed for centuries.
Mothers family offers security for belonging somewhere while there%26rsquo;s always suspicion on the fathers side.

Interestingly, it is the young parents who support the rivalry between the grandparents. The reasons are numerous and they range from the working hours, job types and age to unregulated relationships in the families and disagreements.

These disagreements between the parents and grandparents should be put aside when it comes to children. No grandparents should be shut down from the children%26rsquo;s lives because they too are crucial for the kids%26rsquo; development and happiness.

There are ways to bring grandparents into the children%26rsquo;s lives and create a healthy environment for everyone.

%26bull; Virtues and qualities of both sides should be praised so that children could develop more interests and realize that both fishing and crafts are useful and fun to do.
%26bull; Families should gather together if not on regular basis then certainly during birthday and other celebrations. Grandparents on both sides should socialize during these events.
%26bull; Don%26rsquo;t be one-sided just because you trust your parents more or know their habits and methods. Children should not know about your preferences as they are very likely to accept them even though they are based on prejudices.
%26bull; If you disagree on the grandparents%26rsquo; ways and rules, you should say it loud and clear instead of denying them the children%26rsquo;s visits.

If other grandparents live far away, the grandchildren should visit them during the holidays and cherish these moments. It is certain that those who spend more time with the kids will be more appreciated and this should be avoided.
If one side is better situated and can provided more and better presents, children should be taught to value the nonmaterial aspects of the other relationship.

So, parents, put aside your differences and help your children be better people.